#only one more week of posting left | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

yumedoca · 4 months ago

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So yeah, 'Ranma 0.5' or something like that..

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averlym · 1 year ago

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litany of the martyrs (click for better resolution!)

#at some point i wanted to make an illustration for each character but in retrospect maybe each is multiple song-coded..#drew the sketch for a quincy thing after a chat with a mutual reminded me this song existed dfsghjkl and then spent weeks rendering this #quincy cynthius martin #adamandi #i'm finally done with this! the saints especially were joys to paint and the halo a menace.... this has been the most ambitious one so far.#but it also took quite long because i only worked on it <engages with quincy> when mentally okay to deal with the themes. i'm not religious #but i do identify with the irrational(?ish) guilt + family legacy + academic achievement + disregard for self. also more complex thoughts #about love [but depsite quincent being a large part of quincy's character this piece deals with mostly the Rest of it. so another time..]#anyways! in the original sketch- the saints had heads bent towards quincy so the halo spikes pointed at him. but this worked better! halos #of the saints implying/creating one for quincy was a concept from the start though. in the show they don't touch him directly here but #differences in mediums i think- i don't have time in an image to craft a narrative so everything has to be happening. also artistic liberty #misc inspiration for this includes stained glass windows. i might have maybe misinterpreted the saint costume but i think i logic-ed it out #as the cloth part following a nun's habit w the hood. and then halo above. the material is also more transparent originally but i had. um.#too much fun painting fabric folds.. if you look closely you can see the basis of faces though behind the cloth; but only the vague shapes #because smth obscurity + inhumanness// cassian is the only one i gave a mouth though. that stems from melliot's post about the saints and #st cassian as spokesperson (<- did research teehee!) that's also how i found out which costume = which saint. speaking of which.#left to right: 'st lucy take my hand' // 'st lawrence give me strength' (presses quincy forward; but hand on shoulder connotates guidance)#/'st cassian help me smile' (quincy's mouth is btwn a grimace and a smile; tilts up at side. also no direct touch bc added insidiousness.)#//'st jude [...] i hope your causes burn' (jude's hand is in two places to show movement- nearing the flame and then snatching back; burnt)#other notes: at the midst of the flame the core is shaped like a human heart /the saints and their wax are all melting like the candle for #fun visual effect and also this way they are even less tangible <real>. perks of painting as a medium i guess. // also insp from icarus?#wax and burning imagery; looking at the halo and rays as parallel to sun that burns. too close to the sun; melting; hurting; hurtling //#candles at bottom are a nod to the frankly gorgeous set// also the entire composition kind of stems from the lyric <what use is a candle if #both ends aren't burning>; the two sides between the concepts of catholic guilt and academic perfection that spur quincy #the halo above (saints and guilt; litanyofthemartyrs) and the 'halo' below (academic papers; insp from choreo for perfect at school)#the papers were originally supposed to be more glowy. but i like the idea of it now being a reflection of how quincy's priorities shift #also of note is that <candle> in centre = quincy; w burning candle + aforementioned heart in flame -> most human; idea of love + passion #last thoughts: kneeling + hands close tgt = prayer //wax dripping onto the red As make an effect that looks like blood. because i like #hiding that within the adamandi pieces :OO continuity!! // i've run out of tags but yeah! had fun with this one! every so often i go a #little insane in making art and the final result astounds even me. ngl i'm quite proud of this one. pretty colours <3333

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lemongogo · 1 month ago

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college … wasted on the youth (me)

#didnt help that 2/4 yrs was covid telezoom but man.. MANNN #forgetting how impossible it is to pursue rhe degree plan u actually want (advising hell) i feel like . theres just #so many diff things i want to learn now Knowing that im more solidified in my interests and who i am and what i would be interested in doing #and like.😭RGAAAAAQH TEARING MYHAIR OUTTT every other week i have a night where im sititng there like damn i couldve been sm1 completely dif #dgmw i still rly enjoy some of the upper div classes i Did take but what if i took x and liked it more or minored in y and it led me to z #bc i do feel rly set in where i am rn which . i DO ! like it but im never gna be in that environment where u have the flexibility to explore #ykwim . i wish i had taken physics and calc srsly . i always thought i hated that shit but i like it. i like it quite a lot actually😟#or more geology .. urrghh.. sprinkle in sme extra art history . no bc thats what actu pissed me off ab school #i rmbr wanting to dual major and they straight up told me no i cant . but then i was like maybe an arts major bio minor when i wanted to do #science illustration but sry we dont offer bio minor . ok bio major arh or studio art minor . no sry not enough open spots we rly only #reserve it for when we have extra openings post admission❤️#and then even late into sophomore year u would still be last in registration so all the cool classes would be closed #and then bc of covid half that shit was cancelled bc they couldnt transfer labs online (rip comparative vertebrate anatomy)#and then by senior yr an additional collection of classes were unavailable bc u dont have the prereqs bc the prereqs were cancelled during #covid and u dont have enough semesters left to actually take it . like it was gen such an awful experience so ik why i couldnt ever do what #i wanted but .😭 AND LIKE the classes i DID enjoy like genomics or molecular genetics were closed by registration and i had to email and beg #for access . thts crazy .literally crazy .#anyways . i think i want 2 start reading textbooks bc i think thats the closest ill get LMAOO #i remember seeing my coworker read a textbook for fun one time and idk why i just didnt understand why bc it seemed so dry but i Get it now #like yeah .. u knew what was up ..#sad too that like . i could theoretically audit a course but i Work..during the day .. so sad . so sad #guys wht if i just said yes to grad school (<the devil talking.dont agree)

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murdleandmarot · 7 months ago

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A quick bluebelle painting :))

#when I had this hairstyle I gave up doing the braids after like 2 week #ngl it’s really difficult #anywayyyyyy bluebelle ilyyyyy 💙💙💙💙#DO NOT look at her left hand pls and thank youuuuuu #I FINALLY FIGURED OUT WHERE I WANT TO GO WITH HER STORY YIPEE‼️‼️‼️‼️#do I have it written down or finalized yet?????? absolutely not #but I have the skeleton #I have to construct the flesh and the sinew #sigh the horror writer in me will literally never leave <333 #live laugh love you sapphic cannibalism story I wrote you will forever be famous #so I figured something cool out about being half deaf #when I use my headphones #I only have to use one so when that one runs out of battery #I can just put the other one in!!!#but ✨backwards✨✨#guys I love the lady of shallot she’s so bluebelle coded #IM FINALLY WORKING ON AN ACTUAL PROJECT AGAIN #it’s another oc painting….but more of them at once…..#I’ve never embarked on such an adventure before #I’m having so much fun #I need to shut up oh my god 😭😭😭#shamelessly oc posting #you can do whatever you want forever!! (except when it’s me lmaoooo)#okay okay okay Bluebelle you will be FOREVER famous 💙💙#cats the musical #cats musical #cats oc #jellicle oc #sorah’s silly scribbles

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aurorangen · 11 months ago

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After graduation came a break before work started for Renee. It was also Jay and Miracle's wedding! Renee and Vincent travelled all the way to Chestnut Ridge for this special occasion and it was such a joy to see Jay again! Though Vincent felt a bit light-headed upon arriving. He was just tired from the long journey, right? But don't worry he felt a lot better after a nap on the bench.

Transcript:

Renee: Finally we are here! Now where are we meant to meet Jay and Miracle? Vincent: Uhh my head [takes a moment to respond] Didn't he say New Appaloosa? The town centre? Renee: Let me check google maps again. Aha! We are in New Appaloosa.

[Renee continues looking. She zooms out to Oasis Springs, to an area of endless desert…just out of curiosity] Renee: I guess they couldn't update the map as there's no evidence. So this place must be Strangervil-

[Vincent's mind goes blank for a second and suddenly Renee's voice seems so far away. His head sways to one side and his eyes struggle to stay open. He could see Renee but everything looks blurry] Renee: Vince! Are you ok? [she grabs hold of him and they walk towards a bench to sit down]

Vincent: Shit. I just blanked out for a sec. God, I'm so knackered from the flight. Renee: Here have some water. We'll rest for a bit longer, there's time [snuggles close to him] Vincent: [smiles and rests his eyes] What would I do without you Renee?

Jay: [clears throat] Ahem still recognise me? Renee: Jay!?! Ahh Jay, it really is you! Damn, it's been so long! Jay: You're the same as always! I missed you, Renee.

Renee: And Miracle [squeals] Woah you're so beautiful in person! Miracle: Thanks gorgeous! You're exactly how Jay had described! [sees Vincent resting] Oh is Vincent OK? Renee: Yeah he's just tired. Hey Vince look who's arrived.

Vincent: Oh it's Jay and Miracle! Sorry, my head's a bit [he blinks a few times] It's so good to finally meet you two, just call me Vince, any friend of Renee is a friend of mine! And congrats, we can't wait for the big day! Jay: We've been dreaming about it forever, right Mir? And I've heard so much about you Vince.

[The guys continue walking as they get to know more about each other] Vincent: [nudges him] Oh god what did Renee tell you? Hopefully only good things eh? Jay: Well…interesting to say the least [they laugh together]

#ts4 #sims 4 #ts4 gameplay #ts4 legacy #postcard legacy #postcard gen 3 #renee reichmann #vincent kingsley #jay pollock by duusheen #miracle holm by duusheen #im linking everything and anything i can for my whole mystery and #chestnut ridge...perfect location 😏#a slow update but here it is!#im only playing to destress from school and its exam month soooo #one more post left! and im not touching simblr for a few weeks #it just makes me so happy to see renee and jay together in a post!!!#and them all meeting 🥹#and those interesting things jay knows #renee knows vincent doesnt like talking about his past (as of now) so did not share so much to jay. jay is like a brother to her #so he was concerned about what little things she told him! he doesnt know about his heart condition or much about his past!#just the basics and a mention that his family was involved in a case...

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zukoisgayforsokka · 2 years ago

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Chapter 4: Connections

Beauty and the Beast AU

Chapter: 1

Ship: Suki/Yue

Ultimate chapters: 5, posts on Fridays

Word Count: 1.6k (20k when finished)

Summary: [Suki’s panic seems strange, almost unnecessary in the calmness the woman exhibits. The library is cold, its high ceilings and walls of books swallowing the heat, but she is curled up cosy and content. Suki pushes on, unwilling to forget her mission. “I came back to rescue you.”]

The old abandoned castle hides the most beautiful woman Suki has ever met, and a terrible Beast

Happy birthday @ambykinns! Much thanks to @unacaritafeliz for beta reading

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vegaseatsass · 6 months ago

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I took a nap earlier tonight which was a luxurious and great choice on my part but now I'm fighting the impulse to fuck around online til 9am when My Stand-in 5 drops and just catch up on sleep on Saturday lol

#i won't do this! i promise i won't do this #but part of my brain very much thinks i will do this #we're so close... just 8 more hours #dear diary #i only have a few weeks left of this job and i have tried to not publicly shittalk so i don't get doxxed #so that i 1. sustain my professional relationships 2. don't have my ass eating mafia torturer blog associated with my worksona #but the closer i get to the end the closer i also get to the end of my rope #it is so hard not to vent or to fantasize about publicly venting as soon as i'm set in a new job #so that's the other reason my brain won't let me sleep #so many moral quandaries this year i could not post my way through #but either i will finish working here in 2wks or bluesky will let you have private accounts #whichever comes first. one way or another the end is nigh

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seventh-district · 7 months ago

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so uh. that 2.2 Special Program, huh

#hsr #honkai star rail #hsr 2.2 #hsr spoilers #hsr leaks #the body of this post reads as far less enthusiastic than i really am #i just don’t know how to casually return from my latest 2 week hiatus only to gush abt a game i’ve hardly blogged abt before #but i’m not making a whole ass sideblog for it like i did for Genshin. nah y’all r gonna bear witness to my fixation with this one #so anyways don’t mind me. vibrating into another dimension with anticipation for the next 11 days #it’s insane man. a year ago i Never ever woulda thought i’d be so invested in this game. and it took Months for the game to really grab me #but i’m v glad i kept coming back even when i was struggling to really get into it. like i just had this feeling that if i stuck around and #gave the game a chance to really like. come into its stride. i just always felt like there was Something there and i just hadn’t found it #and holy shit i finally found it in Penacony. the devs really truly outdid themselves with this region and these characters and this story #not to discount everything that’s happened prior. like i was genuinely Liking it all before now but i wasn’t Loving it y’know #but that may be more a ‘me having to fight tooth n’ nail to force myself to consume new media’ thing than it is a matter of the actual game #anyways i came here to talk abt the program! bc since i’m not filming my HSR stuff i’m gonna be insufferable abt it on Tumblr instead ! :)#and i’m probably not filming any more Genshin stuff. or anything else at all for that matter but let’s not talk abt that dead dream #pun not intended lmao. Anyways let’s return to the subject at hand while there’s still room left in these tags shall we #i’m so fucking glad they had Aventurine on this program man. especially since he’s leaked to only have 18 lines in 2.2… it was nice to see-#-him here at least 🥹 i’ll take what i can get. his unenthusiastic little bird noises at the beginning.. him being reluctant to come out..#the way one of the first things to come out of his mouth was ‘y’know DR RATIO once told me…’ like boy we get it ur in love with him 🙄 (/J!)#i love how they can’t go on these programs w/o talking abt each other it’s adorable. AND THE WAY HE WAS THE ONE TO EXPLAIN BOOTHILL’S KIT!?#they can’t just fuel my crackship like this… god and his whole ‘muddle-fudger.. son-of-a-nice-lady?’ thing had me wheezing #Aven mocking Boothill’s inability to curse was not on my special program bingo card but fuck i’m here for it #and Robin being all curious abt him was so cute.. ‘who /is/ he? … does he order milk at the bar?’ i’m crying she’s so sweet #also the trailer was fucking insane. which feels redundant as hell bc all of HoYo’s version trailers go hard but like. still. wow.#that millisecond long shot of Boothill surveying the skyline is so fucking good. also what the fuck is Jing Yuan doing here!!#not complaining at all tho. we’ve got JY & DH(IL?). Argenti(?). Boothill. Sunday. Aven. all my men r here and i am eating so fucking good #Seven.txt #viddy game stuff

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mugwot · 2 months ago

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hm

#ramble tag #more like vent tag but i refuse to have one of those you can just ignore me you are smart #like seriously dont read this unless you really wanna and are snooping #i think there's something wrong with my brain #the executives have really refused to function #or some such nonsense i don't know i am just saying things #if i blame it on a vaguely medical sounding problem i feel less personally responsible about it #its been roughly 4 days #the hours are slipping away like sand through fingers #and i cant Do Anything #its infuriating #i can only Think about all the work i need to do but i Can't Do it #i only have 6 days left probably less i dont know the exact deadline and i have made No progress and i know i just have to Start #but like every time there is a slightest huccup i just get pulled away from the task and oops its dark out now!#and its like i dont even care #i am not sad or scared or angry except i know i should be so its like a ghost of a feeling #i dont want to die and dont want to live if i could i would just sit and read or even just think alone with my mind for a week straight #after i post this i will open the document pull out the tablet and start again i need to Start #aughhhh #how am i even an adult human person #this cant be how real human people live nothing would ever get done and we would starve to death #people here like to say that ooh 20 is not an adult that doesn't count but like #if i was less of a dumbass i would be living if not on my own then not with my parents #and i cant imagine surviving like that #that might be part of why that didn't happen #i am straight up just not an independent person right now #i have been avoiding booking an appointment to cut my hair for half a month #and avoiding scheduling to pick up the piercings I Wanted for 2! maybe 3! i dont know anymore!#okay this ends here #not the moping the tags

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felidthing · 2 months ago

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3 hour zoom class is indeed tiring

#one more hour left actually but the whole thing is 3hr. wough #only once a week though. im gonna get LUNCH after babeyy and then i need to get class supplies also #posts #i wasnt in school during zoom era i haven't built up the tolerance everyone has now

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gaytoddhoward · 5 months ago

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i kind of need to be like skinned or put into a meat grinder or something . lol .

#personal #vent #vent in tags #maybe i can just boil myself alive instead #im so SICK of being the one to be actively concerned with all my friends' health & having to tell them to take care of themselves #'yeah i threw up from a hangover on the way here and i havent eaten in like 3 days and i dont do anything other than work and sleep'#ARE YOU FUCKING WITH ME #'i only shower once a week' we can tell 'and i dont ever use shampoo. and im still surviving off a diet of just top ramen and dr pepper'#MY BROTHER IN CHRIST. TAKE BETTER CARE OF YOURSELF #'i havent made a doctors appointment for this possibly life threatening issue yet' im actually going to start sobbing .#IM NOT. MAD AT ANY OF MY FRIENDS TO BE CLEAR #but god its so fucking tiring. to be one of maybe two people to actually go 'hey that is really concerning please take care of yourself'#and then i cant fucking. take care of myself & i dont have the energy to think about my friends health anymore and i feel bad about it #i am NOT the pinnacle of health. but got damb !! if ur gonna not take care of yourself please do not tell me about it i get so so worried #& then my mother . god. waves vaguely at any interaction i have with her. doesnt make it any better #im so sick i need out of this house & out of this town get me outta here ! id thrive in pokemon put me in the pokeverse or some shit PLEASE #if ur the one person who i mentioned in tags thats also on tumblr pls pls know i am not mad at you im just so stressed always #& i care for u so deeply & it worries me so bad that u/ur family havent made more progress towards getting the issue solved .#(u probably won't see this post anyways but if u do. i just want it to be clear)#ANYWAYS it just crazy how i can bounce so rapidly from 'im not even human' to 'i am Too human'. and iam so so sick .of it.#if a single customer even makes eye contact with me at work tomorrow im going to gnaw my left pinky off in front of them i stg

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tardis--dreams · 3 months ago

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I actually realized i hate work. Won't be putting any effort into this anymore ♡

#sure whatever #it's funny because when i applied there i really really wanted this job #and it had nothing to do with that one person i got a little overly attached to #and when i started working there it was fine but i think really the only reason i liked it was because of that colleague #and now he's gone there's only annoying things left #also maybe i got too cuddled by him because he's always had my back until now #but i have to try to get things from the design team now and they just straight up ignore me lmao #like. my colleague asked me last week if i could ask them to edit some images which i did and they ignored me for 2 days #then HE sent them a follow up message and surprise surprise the images were there within 30 minutes #now again. he asked me to request some images and then built them into the journal #i request them. i hear nothing back. i send a follow up saying it's kinda important. i get nothing #oh well sorry man. guess you'll have to do that yourself after all (:#(i think it's really nice he's trying to give me so much more responsibility and all but if he's not there to back me up #it's literally not working because Everyone Is Ignoring Me :)))#also two weeks from now I'll be alone in our office because my other colleague who's in the same office as us #has announced she's gonna go share the office with someone else because she's gonna be alone otherwise #lol thanks #also some other shit someone posted in the group chat today which really pissed me off #AND the fact i got ignored AGAIN when i asked for work :) like bitches. i literally just watched netflix on my private laptop #while wiggling the mouse on my work laptop until i got off lmao #i won't go to the office tomorrow either #i was gonna go but i can't do shit there if i get ignored again #at least at home i can do whatever i want when they decide i should just get money for wasting my time ♡#i might actually just not work tomorrow #I'll probably log in just to see if there's any updates on the images situation but if not I'll fuck right off #fun times #(also maybe just maybe I'm generally a little negative these days. that may play into it. I'm sensing that sweet summertime blues ♡#((who cares if it's because of my father's death or because of my colleague's going away or because of general existential despair due to #university.... i'm just annoyed) )#void screams

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trans-yllz · 4 months ago

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with the completion of the high priestess, I have officially finished half of the sketches for the cql tarot set 😤

#the devil and justice are Almost done but each have certain parts I'm dreading finishing 😭#well. I've got a month and a half to finish the other half of the sketches ink everything and paint it all.#TO BE FAIR. theres only one more 40 hr week left #its gonna be crunch time tho. I want to be painting by the start of next month.... I doubt it LMAO #ghost posts #text #cql tarot

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a9saga · 4 months ago

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youtube

tbt - versaemerge - redesign me // i would like to apologize to versaemerge personally for not assuming that their debut album would hold up nearly as well as it did

#i listened to this album a few weeks ago after getting broken up with lol #probably hadnt listened to it in a decade minimum but versa were my favorite band for a time when i was 12-13 #they were really different from all the pop punk/emo bands in their scene though they always had a taste #for different lyrics and for a much more experimental sound than a lot of the safer bands like atl or hey monday #lost tree is a hell of an album closer that one was really classic rock of them tbh #i didnt get it when i was 12 lol #album medleys just didnt mean anything to me yet at that age #i should check out sierra's new band #one last thing about versa tho #bassist devin said in a blog post i think after versa left fbr and went independent #he believed the only reason fbr really wanted them was to keep them from being competition w paramore #.....yeah i think he really hit the nail on the head w that one. a lot of labels wanted them #and they offered a sound the other female fronted bands didnt have--or other bands in the scene for that matter #the label did them so dirty i cant believe this was their only lp rip #song rec #versa #versaemerge #fueled by ramen #tbt #emo #fixed at zero #shut up kaily #q'd 8/6/2024 #Youtube

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braceletofteeth · 1 year ago

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tag someone you want to know and/or some of your besties.

I was tagged by @fourth-quartet 😊 Thank you!!

favourite colour: Gray but I'm currently in a brown phase

last song: I've got recently reacquainted with Beginner by AKB48 😄

youtube

last series: The Kidnapping Day. It was a lot more wholesome than the name suggests.

last movie: Saw X (surprisingly also a lot more wholesome than you'd expect????)

sweet/savoury/spicy: Sweet :3

currently watching:

Koisenu Futari

Chains of Heart

The Golden Girls (season 1)

Love in the Air (2nd rewatch)

other stuff I watched this year: Not listing all of it here (I've never watched so much stuff as I did in 2023), but I'll mention the ones that I enjoyed watching the most from each month so far (*not including rewatches):

JAN: Wednesday

FEB: GAP

MAR: Not Me

APR: Tick, Tick... Boom!

MAY: Utsukushii Kare

JUN: Tale of the Nine-Tailed 1938

JUL: Takin' Over The Asylum

AUG: Marry My Dead Body

SEP: Utsukushii Kare: Eternal

OCT: The Sandman

shows I dropped this year/didn't finish: I barely remember the ones I watched till the very end 🤡 But ok, let me see...

Eve (dropped after one episode; Rich People and their Rich People Problems™, I think was the reason)

A few straight GMMTV shows that I didn't really catch the name (I. Well. I just. I just couldn't make myself give a fuck, ok 😔)

+ Currently deliberating whether or not I should drop Chains of Heart. All the subtitles I've found are lacking in terms of coherence, and the story itself is already not the most straightforward, so I can only hope I'm understanding what's going on at all? 😀 And I'm also not feeling the main couple from either the present nor the past (? I suspect they are the same (but I may never know))... HOWEVER, I like the acting of the main, and the Thai scenario that is not Bangkok for once. That's always refreshing. And sometimes the cinematography is pretty too... Decisions, decisions...

currently listening to: Back for More by TXT & Anitta (I went after the link for it and distractedly searched for "banger" instead of the title 😆)

youtube

currently reading: Codename Villanelle (it's a small book but I'm. ..struggle)

current obsession: I'm not obsessing over anything at the moment 😟☹😫 Have been too busy with mundane adult life problems (therefore, as you can imagine, I'm just about going up the walls here :))

tagging: @eatprayworm @thisautistic @hyp-no-tic @visualtaehyun hi 👋

#tag game #it's one of those weeks when I feel like my old acquaintances might be sick of me already #SO I tagged some people I think might be really cool but haven't directly approached yet #you know. for maximum anxiety #I've lost many songs over the years (it's never safe to have only one copy of them; thankfully I can afford more now)#the first time I found Beginner (as a pre-teen) I just downloaded it randomly listened to it and liked it so much I decided to keep it??#oh to be young and not care about stuff like viruses or managing your time #at some point while writing this post I finished watching Ko¡senu Fut@ri #10/10 no notes #(lies. there are notes. dozens and dozens of reblogs just waiting for me to spread them all over your dashboards in the near future)#tick tick boom was quite nice... for a musical #(not a fan of musicals so to have one on my list is. wild)#already four months since the Lee brothers left me 😪#and I haven't heard a word about LDW's new drama in MONTHS. actively gnawing the bars of my cage rn #OH OH WAIT I ALMOST FORGOT #SPECIAL MENTION TO <SUMMER STRIKE> IN MAY #if my other option wasn't Utsukush¡i fricking K@re I wouldn't even hesitate. but. it was #and everyone knows I'm not normal about this one 😀🙂#if anyone wants to advocate in favor of Ch@ins of Heart. please. I'm all ears. is it worth it?#uhh. I'm not gonna disclose much but it's true I'm under a lot of stress lately. there is a lot going on right now.#I might not be able to watch new shows/be around tumblr while I (try to) sort my shit out #just a quick heads up 👍

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emometalhead · 7 months ago

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#having a day full of mixed feelings #I suppose this is how life goes #I'm officially done with my Bachelor's degree as of today #obviously I'm proud of myself for the accomplishment and I was excited to be celebrated today #it was a long and difficult road and there were many times where I didn't think I'd live to see it through but I made it #I'm the first person in my family to get this degree and I was really looking forward to having today be my day #I had a really lovely morning and then things kind of waned #there were a few arguments. someone I spent the day with repeatedly made negative comments about something I care about #it felt awful. I know it was intended as more of a playful jab than anything but I directly asked for the comments to stop and they didn't #it especially hurt that it was a fandom thing and the person is so invested in their own fandoms yet they felt it fair to step on mine #even though I've never done that to them #then people kept talking over me and acted like I was wrong for trying to interject to finish my own sentences #also as I said in the last post I was deeply upset by how my family members spoke of my 12 year old cousin #she's just a kid and some of our close family members have such a nasty opinion of her. she's so young and she's had a rough few years #but it seems like no one except my brother and I are willing to give her any grace #I think everyone else has forgotten what it feels like to be a kid and feel as if the world is against you #on a more positive note. I had a decadent slice of chocolate cake. it was heavenly #unfortunately I was really too in my head to fully enjoy it #literally every day for 3 weeks I've been talking about the lunch I planned to have today #I knew exactly what meal and dessert I wanted from the restaurant. it's my absolute fave and isn't available at any other local restaurant #I was totally starving by time we got to the restaurant. we were out all morning and I ate a tiny breakfast in anticipation of this meal #when we got there we found out they removed what I planned to order from the menu. I was devastated.#I know it's stupid but like this was the one part of my day that I've had planned for MONTHS and I've been thinking about it for weeks #we had a 40 minute car ride where I mentioned my excitement for the food no less than 10 times so this crushed me #also I'm just really picky in general and typically restaurants only have one or two things I'm able to eat #I offered to just eat the dessert while everyone else ordered food because they were all really hungry too but they wouldn't allow it #we left the restaurant and I still feel horrible for walking out. if I had known the item was removed we wouldn't have even gone there #it happened so recently though and I feel dumb for not even thinking to check the menu online beforehand #so we went to another restaurant and I barely ate anything and now I have no appetite for dinner and I feel bad for ruining the afternoon #even though it's my day and my celebration and I feel like I'm entitled to a slight amount of unreasonableness

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